Are You a Tweaker?
It doesn’t matter what you call it. It doesn’t matter how you did it. It brought us to our knees,
because without exception, that’s what it does.
Is speed a problem in your life? Are you an addict? Only you can answer those questions.
For most of us who have admitted defeat, the answer is very clear. Yes, we had a problem with
speed, and no, we couldn’t fix the problem by ourselves. We had to admit defeat to win. Speed
was our master.
We couldn’t control our drug use. What started out as weekend or occasional use became daily
use, and we soon found ourselves beyond human aid. We truly suffered from a lack of power to
fix our problem.
Some of us used speed as a tool to work harder and longer, but we couldn’t keep a job. Others
picked at their faces and arms for hours and hours or pulled out their hair. Some of us had
uncontrollable sexual desire. Others endlessly tinkered with projects, accomplishing nothing,
but found ourselves so busy we couldn’t get to work on time.
We deluded ourselves into thinking that staying up for nights on end was OK, that our tweaking
was under control, and that we could quit if we wanted to, or that we couldn’t afford to quit, or
that our using didn’t affect our lives.
Maybe we saw a friend go to jail, or lose their apartment, or lose their job, or lose the trust of
their family, or die, but our clouded minds wouldn’t admit we were next.
Most of us saw no way out, believing that we would use until the day we died.
Almost universally, if we had an honest moment, we found that our drug use made seemingly
insurmountable problems in our lives.
The only way out was if we had the courage to admit that speed, our one time friend,
was killing us.
It doesn’t matter how you got here. The courts sent some of us, others came for family or
friends, and some of us came to CMA on our own. The question is, if you want help and
are willing to go to any lengths to change your life.
What Is The Crystal Meth Anonymous Program?
Crystal Meth Anonymous is a fellowship of people for whom crystal
meth has become a serious problem. The members of Crystal Meth
Anonymous meet regularly, share support and fellowship, an create a
safe environment to stay clean.
The fellowship advocates complete abstinence from crystal meth,
alcohol, illegal inhalants, and medications not taken as prescribed as well
as all other mind-altering substances.
Prayer and meditation are important parts of our recovery. Some of us are
suspicious at first, fearing that we will be made to believe certain things.
We may also react to our past experiences with organized religion.
The12-step program we follow is found in the text of the book,
“Alcoholics Anonymous”. We begin to define our relationship with
spirituality as we work the Twelve Steps with a sponsor. The Twelve
Steps are a set of principles designed to produce a spiritual awakening.
The steps promote actions that help us to achieve and maintain sobriety.
They offer a plan for recovery that helps repair the damage our addiction
to crystal meth has caused. The steps guide us in new ways of living
to create a fulfilling life in recovery. Staying clean is our primary goal.
When our actions are consistent with our principles, we can have inner
peace, honesty and serenity.
There is Hope
When we came to CMA we found other crystal meth addicts who had
recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind, body and spirit. They
introduced us to the possibility of a life without crystal meth and by
embracing a program of action, we found that we were able to fill that life
Through the steps, we surrendered our will to the idea that those around
us had solved their problem and could help us get better. We opened
ourselves up to a new way of thinking in which we could stop lying to
ourselves and we allowed our own conception of a higher power to enter
into our lives. We became willing to make the admission to another addict
about our wrongs and offered up our character defects to be removed.
We cleaned up the wreckage from the tornado that was our old life and
we embarked on a new course in which our ego was reduced and love
replaced our selfishness.
The truth of our new lives is that we can handle difficulties that used to
convince us to use crystal meth. We can now help others in ways that we
could never do for ourselves before CMA. By finding a spiritual basis on
which to live we can be part of miracles everyday that are happening all
around us. We can be whole and happy and we can pass hope and our
common solution on to the next addict who is suffering without a way out.
Today I Can
Let’s not forget what we can do this day:
Today I Can…
Draw on the power of honesty. I embrace change and redefine
myself. Word by word, deed by deed—I strive to reflect the truth.
Today I Can…
Put down my old habits. Selfishness and hardness give way to an
instinct for service. Gratitude now is my rule.
Today I Can…
Appreciate the richness of life by welcoming, sharing and laughing
with another addict. Turning Godward, I find progress and peace.
Today I Can…
Take in a new reality—that in this struggle I am not alone.
Many have walked this path before, and I have fellows at my side.
Today…Together…We Can Live in Hope!